Stage

 I have learned (slowly) that every age is a stage. I have learned that some stages you really want to rush through...  The witching hour was one stage I wanted to run away from. Since then things have been swell, until now. Until personality develops, until choices start being made, until language blooms and explodes, and until my child has his own mind.

So this is a stage that so much learning, for him and I, is happening. He is learning boundaries, and trying to push them, I am learning to set them. I am also learning and practising to be the mature adult,  well most of the time anyways.... He knows I mean business, I am extremely consistent in my expectations which is soo soo important. 

We have tried different strategies dealing with behaviour. Time aways no longer work. We don't yell, we do raise our voice at times. And amazingly 1-2-3 works... I tell him mommy is going to count to three then I will help you... He hates this! The thought of mommy helping big boy do what was asked gets him!!

We have had a few, not a lot but a few epic meltdowns in public. The best one to date was trying to leave HomeSense. Typical situation 3 year old sees toy, wants toy, doesn't get toy, panics and melts down. Dad has a bit of a struggle when this happens, unsure of what to do... I wait him out. I give him my direction, and tell him when he is ready then we'll get going. As I said this to him that day- he yells at me " no thank you mommy". I felt the eyes on me, as the sweat drips off of me, I look to where I sense the staring- the cashier- she gives the sympathetic look, but then grins and says-- well, good job  mom, at least he has good manners.......  How true. Haha

It is so hard to keep your cool when in these situations, and often I see parents who can't. I also don't judge those parents either, as I know there is much much more to their story.... It is hard. It is challenging, there is no manual that comes along and gives you all the steps... Shit, there re a million different manuals that all contradict each other.. No wonder moms are all screwed up..... Really.

Maybe he does have it figured out more than I think.... He knows when it gets too much, when he is tired, overwhelmed, he either melts down, or sits.. Regardless of where he is..... Once he is ok in his world, he gets up and carries on.... Maybe we all can learn a little from these little folk?!

Xo